My name is Kandi, I'm 32 years old, have 7 kids {yes, you read that right. 7. Seven. One less than 8, one more than 6. Far beyond sanity and well seated in chaos]. As a result, I weigh ten thousand pounds*. Ok, it's not really as a result of my 7 kids. They didn't help, mind--but it's a combination of laziness, having been raised on fast food, having birthed 7 children, laziness and.. well.. laziness. For political correct[ness], I'll just say I suffer from adult ADHD. This post {as well as subsequent post will seem disjointed}

Ok, so what's the deal, here? 

All bad joking aside, I do have a weight problem that I've had since things like weight started to matter to me. I had an older sister who was gorgeous and thin.. whereas I was simply gorgeous. And intelligent. I was quite literally raised on fast food. I knew the names of fast food chains before I could read. This wasn't because my parents didn't love me. It was more that my parent DID love me and was busy working all day and part of the night with no assistance so that my sister and I could have the things we needed {clothes, shelter, food} as well as some of the things we wanted. Growing up with only my mom working her butt off to keep us alive meant some sacrifices. She just didn't have time to cook us wholesome, healthy meals when she staggered in the door at 8pm. With a bed time of 8:30, we barely had enough time to bolt down whatever she'd brought for us, talk about our days, get help with whatever homework was left over from the afternoon, shower, brush our teeth and get in bed. {Side note: My mom? She's freaking Super Woman} So I didn't develop proper eating habits {not even close} and I developed an extremely limited {picky} palate. Basically, if it didn't come from a deep fryer, it tasted disgusting and I refused to eat it. Still to this day, it will be a miracle for me to try anything new. 

I'm a creature of habit, you see. I have a pattern established from the cradle and I stick with it.

I'm also extremely lazy. Well, no, I'm not lazy, exactly. I'm more uhh.. laid back. Yes, let's run with that. My kids, bless them, have a much broader range of things they will eat {green things, even!!!} How that happened, I couldn't tell you. But they'll 9 times out of 10 pick fruit or something healthy instead of a candy bar. {Except for A#2. He won't eat anything. So I have to feed him whatever I can get him to eat, regardless of how "healthy" it is. I've tried removing everything that's unhealthy from the house. He didn't eat for a solid day. So.. that didn't work out.} Anyway, I'm getting way off topic, here..My apologies.

KANDI'S NOTES: {like Cliff's, except not copyrighted... which... it probably isn't, anyway...}

So I have crappy eating habits. I'm lazy. I don't eat much that is green. I love things that once pumped blood through their veins. I hate exercise. I'm surprisingly healthy--low average blood pressure and all that fun stuff. I'm just fat.

So.. now you know me. Hi, there. 

*Slight exaggeration, modified to protect my ego.

Your comment will be posted after it is approved.

Leave a Reply.